you're east of east saint louis

this kid popped into my head.

he's 19, he wears glasses. geeky type. before geeky was cool. loves to draw. drops notes and drawings into envelopes for me and puts them in the mail. like many boys this age, he frets about his girlfriend prospects.

i have a party at my house and he makes an invitation for me. it looks like a punk rock show flyer. it has mxpx lyrics on it.

he calls us the "two coast crew". west and east. he addresses my letters this way. he puts x's in between our initials. he colors the envelopes.

i wake up one day and he is dead.

eighteen years later - almost as long as he existed on this earth - what's broken still isn't right.

i found his headstone. it was like recovering a little piece of him. it was also like losing him all over again. maybe it wasn't real. it was.

hashtag truth trumps reality. he is more alive than i am. we will fall on each other.

xo to my beautiful old friend.

<< 08.07.18, 12:39 p.m. >>